Allow Myself to Introduce...My...Self

I started to write a post today to talk about something that has recently happened in my household and I realized that I haven’t even properly introduced you to my world. So really, this should have been the first post, but whatever. Here’s the lowdown:

Me: I’m a thirty something woman – married with a 3 year old son. We live in Arlen, Texas and I know that Correct Blogger Etiquette dictates not to release personal details, surely I can tell you my real first name. It’s Stareena. Okay, not really. That’s my old bar name I used to use. It’s a good stripper name, too. But I was never a stripper. My real name is Shannon. I have lived in a bunch of different cities and quite often get a little confused about where I am and give out weird directions to tourists. I work full-time at a paying job, work full-time as an entrepreneur co-founding a company with 4 other women (Oh trust me, you’ll hear about that in good time), and also work full-time as a personal assistant to my 3 year old. I’ve got dogs and cats and talking birds, oh my! And an armadillo that winters under my deck. Subsequent posts will reveal my personality, so no need to talk about it.

Hubby: And I don’t like the word hubby. But husband is so formal, and The Man sounds too much like a 60’s peace group target…so I don’t know how else to talk about him. For now I’ll use hubby and we can come up with something else later. I met hubby in one of those many cities I lived in. We’ve been together over 10 years, but only married about 5 years ago. (and you’ll hear about that someday too) He’s a great guy – I couldn’t ask for a better life partner. He’s a typical guy, but has a really big soft spot that he doesn’t let anyone see. He’ll never read this blog, trust me, so I feel comfortable throwing him under the bus for good stories. I will do that often. We are in it for the long haul and most of our disagreements center around child-rearing. He is addicted to Starbucks. (Please let me know of any local support groups.)

Son: I will call him The Boy. Which is exactly what we have called him since day one. Hubby and I call each other and say “How’s The Boy?” “Are you picking The Boy up?” and this was just fine and dandy until the day a coworker said to me, “Really? That’s what you call him? The Boy? That reminds me of that book The Boy Called It. You’re gonna give him a complex.” So…we still call him The Boy, but now I have spurts of massive guilt about it. Anyway, he is a very sweet boy. He’s absolutely adorable (as all kids are, right?) and he knows it. He is a surprisingly laid back kid, which means he takes after his dad, not his neurotic mom. He definitely changed my life. And I’m pretty certain for the better, but check back after the teenage years are over.

Assorted family: They all live far away.

So welcome to my world This post was not funny or even entertaining, I know, but sometimes, you just need the facts.